Emotional Symptoms of Menopause: You’re Not Losing It — It’s Your Hormones, Brain, and Wiring System 

Emotional symptoms of menopause — like mood swings, brain fog, and anxiety — are some of the most common (and most overlooked) signs of hormonal change. It’s not just stress or mindset. It’s your hormones, your brain chemistry, and your body asking for support. In this article, I’ll walk you through what’s really going on inside, and how to find relief that’s kind, natural, and grounded in what midlife women actually need.

I got a very open and transparent email from a woman last week… and her words have stayed with me. Not just because of what she’s carrying, but because I know so many of us have felt something similar. Crying in the bathroom. Snapping at someone we love. Lying awake at 3 a.m., wondering what happened to the “real me”.

She told me her story. She’s going through perimenopause — already a challenging transition — while also caring for her mother, who has moved in with her. The atmosphere at home has felt heavy. Her mom is struggling in her own way, and at times, the mood can become quite low for the both of them.

She finds herself feeling everything so deeply. To stay grounded, she’s been listening to mental health podcasts — hoping to shift her thinking, stay positive, and find the strength to keep going.

And I felt this ache in my chest. Because I’ve been there, too. You know, trying to push away the anger, the fog, the tears, the fatigue, the anxious swirl in my core. Telling myself I just need to try harder. Smile more.

Yes — when you’re in perimenopause, your brain doesn’t feel like your own. And it’s tricky because most of the things we know about menopause? It’s either hot flashes or night sweats.

We never really got to understand that many women experience emotional symptoms of menopause long before their periods stop. And so, this knowledge gap can leave us thinking, “Why am I so emotional during menopause? What’s happening to me? Am I losing it?”

But here’s the truth: You’re not losing it. And you’re definitely not imagining things. You’re going through one of the biggest hormonal transitions of your life. And yes — it’s your brain getting caught in the middle of all of it.

Let’s start with this: your hormones don’t just control your period or fertility. They affect your entire system — including the chemistry of your brain.

That’s why, at first, perimenopause often doesn’t look like hot flashes. It’s more about mood swings you can’t seem to explain, including:

• Sudden anxiety
• Irritability
• Racing heartbeat for no apparent reason
• Feeling low or numb
• Foggy mind
• Losing your spark
• Fatigue
• Waking up at the oddest hours every night with spiraling thoughts
• Emotional eating and cravings

Here’s what’s really going on underneath it all… Let’s call it your menopause brain chemistry.

(Hint: a lot of those emotional symptoms have got something to do with your hormones and neurotransmitters)!

Progesterone calms your nervous system. It helps you sleep, slow down, and feel safe.

So, when it drops in perimenopause (yes, it’s the first key hormone to decline), your inner alarm system gets louder. You might feel wired, overwhelmed, or like you can’t unwind, no matter how tired you are. She’s the same hormone behind those PMS blues you had during teenage years!

Estrogen helps your brain make serotonin — that “feel good” brain chemical. When estrogen starts to drop (which it does in waves during menopause), serotonin goes with it. That’s why you’re likely to feel down, anxious, or “off,” even if nothing in your life has changed.

Testosterone is lower than ever now in midlife and beyond. This hormone is responsible for motivation, energy, and libido. So, if you’re feeling flat, foggy, or just not like yourself… that’s not you being lazy. That’s your brain chemistry shifting.

So, no — you’re not “too sensitive.”

All the emotional highs and lows are not flaws. They’re signals.

If you’re reacting more strongly to the people around you, the stress, the noise, the demands — it’s not because you’re losing your edge. It’s because your nervous system is in flux, your emotional bandwidth is stretched, and your body is asking for help.

You don’t need a new mindset overnight.
You need relief.

These days, there’s a lot of talk about starting with mindset — shifting your thinking, reframing your story, and leaning into more positive thoughts. And while that can be helpful, especially in the right moment, it’s not always the whole picture.

But here’s the thing: if your gut is inflamed, your hormones are crashing, your nutrient stores are depleted, and your nervous system is stretched thin — your brain may not have the foundation it needs to access those feel-good thoughts.

Even the field of health psychology — which deeply values mindset and emotional resilience — honors that a healthy body, especially through nutrition, is crucial to a flourishing mental well-being.

Put simply: your thoughts don’t create hormones. But your hormones and your gut absolutely shape your thoughts.

In fact, most of your serotonin is made in the gut. So, if your gut’s unhappy, chances are your brain isn’t feeling great either. Add stress, poor sleep, and hormonal turbulence to the mix? No wonder you feel like you’re unraveling.

That’s not a personal failure.
That’s your biology asking for support.

 If you find yourself nodding along with the things and scenes we’ve mentioned above, here’s what I want you to know: There’s hope.

And it starts by getting out of your head — and back into your body. Here’s where you begin:

Think of your gut as the foundation of your home. If the base is cracked, everything built on top wobbles. The same goes for your health! Eat in a way that’s kind to your digestion — gentle, grounding foods like bone broth, fermented foods, good proteins, and fiber-rich plants.

And if you’re feeling bloated, gassy, or backed up, that’s not just annoying — it’s your body’s version of a warning light on the dashboard. Listen to it.

Stress isn’t just “in your head” — it’s like static that drowns out your body’s natural rhythms. Imagine trying to tune in to your favorite song, but the station is fuzzy. That’s what chronic stress does to your gut and hormones. You don’t need a luxurious silent retreat — just small moments to feel safe again.

Try breathwork. Take a walk without your phone. Spend time with nature. Sit outside and meditate for five quiet minutes. Every little form of calm turns the dial down.

You wouldn’t expect a builder to work without tools. Your body’s the same. It can’t create those soothing, feel-good brain chemicals out of thin air! And especially not with substandard materials.

It needs high-quality fuel, like healthy fats, amino acids, magnesium, B-vitamins, and other essential nutrients.

Think real food first, then supplement when needed. That’s not being “extra” — that’s you giving your body the parts it needs to rebuild and recenter!

Menopausal hormone therapy (MHRT) can absolutely be a helpful tool — sometimes it’s just what you need to get over the edge when things feel especially rough. But even then, it works best when the foundations are in place.

If your gut is out of balance, your stress is running high, and your cells are running on empty, even the best hormone therapy might not land the way it’s meant to. It’s like trying to flip on a light switch when the wiring is still a bit frayed — the spark might flicker, but it won’t glow strong.

So yes, consider MHRT if it’s right for you and your doctor agrees. But at the same time, support your base: nourish your gut, calm your nervous system, and feed your body what it’s really missing. That’s how you give any therapy — natural or medical — the best chance to truly help.

If any part of this feels like your life right now — the heaviness at home, the rollercoaster of emotions, the exhaustion you can’t quite name — I want you to hear this:

You’re not alone.
And there’s nothing wrong with you.

You’re living through one of the most powerful (and often overlooked) transitions of a woman’s life. And still — you keep showing up. You’re searching for answers, for calm, for clarity.

So let this be your first small step forward.

The 5-Minute Menopause Map is a simple, gentle guide to help you see where you are — and where you might go next. No deep dives. No pressure. Just a clear, caring starting place.

Because sometimes, the hardest part is just knowing where to begin.

So, start here.
Start with you.
Start with compassion, not criticism.

And please remember:

You’re not unraveling.
You’re responding — to change, to hormones, to everything life is asking of you.

There is a way through.
And I’ll be right here as you find it.

Gita is the founder of My Menopause Journey. Since 2014, she has been supporting midlife women by sharing hard-earned learnings from her own experience. To advance her knowledge, Gita puts a lot of her time and effort into understanding the broad spectrum of women’s health. She immerses in extensive research about the physical, mental and emotional aspects of menopause. Gita believes in the life-changing power of healthy, holistic living — this is where she anchors her message to all women. Learn more about her marvelous mission in About us - My Menopause Journey.